Adulthood is Trouble (Part 2)

Hello. Today is a hot Sunday. Dank. When i wanted to laze around, but the weather forced me to do something instead. Because staying idle felt terrible and this overwhelming energies that i got last night, just sparked non stop. This feeling. It is something like "Second Wind" for me. It has been a while. Really. This burning sensation like i can own the world when i take a step. This powerful feeling. How long have i missed it. Last time something like this happen in the past when i was fat, and they said, "Fat people like you, can't run that far. Don't even mention to enter Academy School with that body." After that like a storm, i tried my best to get in shape. I burned 13kg in less than a month. I could run 2km in 12 minutes. And not stopping at that. I ended up reaching 3km after few months later. I could do 42 perfect push up in 1 minutes, 53 sit ups in 1 minutes, but sadly my arms were weak, i can only do 4 pull ups. lol. Don't mention about swimming, i can do that for hours. much better than my running. Well, enough of that. Because now, I am back to be the fat guy. I'm still working to get back in shape again.

So as i have promised in my previous post, i will update the second major thing. It is about work. In September 2015. When i was a computer technician from door to door. My friends, RMA and AS. They share the same dream as myself. To make our city better. In technology about computer. In Indonesian language it is said as "Melek Teknologi". Because in many case, my customers, and my friend's customers they get a totally wrong idea about computer. Especially in laptop. They get deceived to buy this and that without knowing the real functionality of the items they bought. Our missions that time was to educate people and help them get through it. A noble thing to do, right? Even we could get small profit from it.

So, from September 2015, we created a startup shop. We hope that one day, this startup could become big and became a place where people could come to get education whil bought stuffs too. After that we tried to expand our business. 2 months after that, we have a big news. We could open up a small store in good business area in our city. We worked toward it as best as we could. We maintained it in few months. We were growing. Then the problem in my previous post happened, I didn't have much time to stay in our store. I was becoming an invisible dude who didn't help that much recently. It was sad. But i have to accept that. That was fate that i have to face. Now, i manage things as simple as i can. Take small decisions over things. Without overthinking in the first place. Well for big matters of course i will always end up overthinking. lol.

Beside the problem that happened in previous post, there was a problem in transportation too. I meant, we didn't have that many bikes available to be used. So, it made my situation in my own store worse. I could only come few hours a day, not to mention, most of the time i couldn't even attend in weekend or holiday. Well, i used to stay almost 12 hours a day in my store. We open at 9 AM - 11 PM. It become long because we sell cellulars stuffs too. So we can have another income beside computer stuffs.

Because those things, my store got some kind of indirect impact because of me. I felt so sad. I hope after my sister's bike is out, i can use my bike again to go to work. I need to work harder from now on. And i have to finish my college as fast as i can. After i received "Second Wind" yesterday. I will give you a brief explanation in next post. It is about romance. See you later..... hahaha xD

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Adulthood is Trouble (Part 1)

Hello everyone, it has been a while since i wrote about something, especially in 2016. Most of it was assignments from my lecturers. So i couldn't write anything, because i thought that they would notice it and read my stupid journey. lol. Well, i have plenty of things that went bad. I will explain some of it in numbers. For now, i will tell you guys about the major first.

First of all, the decline health of my father. This is the huge hit for me. The guy that i looked up to. The idol in my heart for long period of time began to die out. I meant, i kept losing my faith on him. I didn't know why he became like this. He was the best man that i could look up to. I thought that i was being denial. Because i couldn't accept, "Nobody's Perfect".

He handled us as small family (now we are kind of big). Eating good food with great nutrition was his priority when i was a kid. In my family, we were forced to finish the meal that we took. So if you couldn't eat much, you shouldn't take the amount that you couldn't handle. If you did, get ready to cry later. At that time, as a small family that just started out, most of the time we could eat was eggs thingy. We did buy beef, chicken, or fish too. But most of the time it was eggs. I could eat more than 1 egg a day. Because when my sisters couldn't eat much, i ended up finishing their food. Because we were so afraid that my father would get angry if we didn't finish our foods. Ah i forget to tell you, we were forced to eat based on my father's amount. Not our own amount. In food thingy i mean. lol.

He managed every single thing in my house. He taught me every basic thing in the worldly knowledge or knowledge about my religion, as it resulted that i was excel in it. I could be proud when compared to kids in my age. I was being the first, in school or in neighborhood as a kid. Even now, if i give a little time to learn something, i could comprehend it fast. The only bad thing was he haven't have time to teach us that much. Especially in sport. He forced us, siblings to work our way alone. I'm not going to critic his parental teaching method. It is just that he haven't give any inheritance in that area. I could be careless about inheritance in money, material or something like that. But knowledge, it is different matter.

He was the best dad i ever knew. He could cook. He could do shopping. He could repair things. He could take care the three of us siblings at that time easily (now we are 7 brothers and sisters). He was someone that could handle everything easily. He was strong, he told us that he could run and cycling for kilometres back in the day when he was kid. He could wake up easily in dawn. Whatever time he intended to wake up, he could do it. The result was fantastic for 56 years, until 2015, he never have major sickness that i could tell. Even if he was, he hid it very well. Because he appeared healthy, even now when he is very sick. I love him so much. My eyes always get cloudy, whenever i remembered things in the past when we were kids. When my father focused his best attention to make sure we got what we needed.

Now, i couldn't explain what happened to him. I mean i couldn't write it here. Because i want to remember all the good things only for him. The bad things are for me to learn. But i'm sure one of the factor is money. It changed things. There are tons of things i have to think as adult. Time keep passing each minutes, hours, days, and years. And now i think throughly for every decision i have to make. And because of that, i have trust issue. I think that's all for now. I will continue another thing in part two. Let me think about it, there will be two topic, work and romance for future parts.

I hope you guys could learn something from my experiance after all this time. Even maybe it is so small. Still, i hope i can be some kind of help. Alright, see you later on second part. I will try my best to update it soon.

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